in the last 72 hours I have been subject to intensifying dreams that seem to portend some great movement within me
Jumbled images and intense feelings of guilt, anguish, shame and confusion flicker one after another as I sleep. My dream life seems to be beating on the door of my consciousness.
A house breaks open like a seedpod and from the earth below a golden, crystalline structure spirals upward.
I rush to the basement of the house and see stacks of gold bars and begin to haul them up before they are lost to the churning of the new structure. This treasure shouldn’t be wasted, I could use it. After a while I notice that the personal items of Bridget and I are also in this basement and I abandon my effort to save the gold bars and begin frantically hauling our stuff in flimsy bags. I throw the bags in a pile and begin to grow afraid that I cannot save it all.
Images of the golden spiral reaching higher, glinting in the light of dawn, are shown to me and I no longer try to save anything that the old house contained.
Awake, Bridget has already made coffee and I gratefully drink the cup as we prop against the wall on pillows.
The dream, a direct message, still commands the center of my focus (hence the blog).
What am i holding on to?
What trash am I trying to save?
What am I identifying as important as it is swept under by a vastly more beautiful and complex structure?
Before I can tell Bridget about my dream she mentions that in dream symbolism that houses are often regarded as an aspect of your higher self, “the mansions of the soul”.
What is being born in me and why am I afraid it will destroy my gold bars and boxes of dusty books?